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The tragedies
of Sept. 11 marked one of the most horrific occurrences in American
history. The attacks not only robbed the nation of innocent loved
ones, but also undercut the security and confidence many American
citizens had previously, without even realizing, found comfort in.
Prior to the devastation, we took our overwhelming sense of safety
and privilege for granted, not appreciating how fortunate our country
truly was. We were happy. We were innocent.
Too
astonished to weep, too overwhelmed to fully comprehend it
all, we banded together in an attempt to salvage anything
concrete; we came together as a nation. |
And then we
woke up to the brutal reality of the violence that exists in this
world. We opened our eyes to seeing, hearing, and even feeling the
fear. Everything that we thought held us up seemed to wash out from
under our feet. Too astonished to weep, too overwhelmed to fully
comprehend it all, we banded together in an attempt to salvage anything
concrete; we came together as a nation.
In the wake
of the World Trade Center, The Pentagon, and Flight 93, we were
forced to imagine not only the downfall of a great city but the
severity of the wounds to our great nation. We reached for something,
anything, to hang on to, and found our strength in one another.
On the one
year anniversary of the tragedies, a time of great sadness and patriotism,
I found myself in the midst of a foreign culture, in what seemed
to be the farthest place from where I wanted to be on that day.
I wanted to be home in New Jersey, with my family, my friends, the
people who I had turned to at the time of the crisis. Instead, I
was three days into my semester in Worcester, England, in the company
of three other American students who felt the same as me, plus a
flat of foreign students who just did not get it and a country of
people who could not understand what we were going through that
day and could not possibly be expected to relate to what we went
through one year before.
At the time
when the United States was mourning, I stood at a small gathering
in a student union building in the midlands of England, joined only
by my three fellow American students and our British study abroad
director. As we set our vision on a television screen in the corner
of the open room, we wiped at puddles in our eyes, re-crying the
tears we had cried so many times over the past year, and trying
to tune out the life that went on around us. British accents roared,
people chuckled and during one span, the drumming of a loud machine
drowned out the mellow sound of Rudy Giuliani’s voice while
he began to read aloud the names of each victim.
I
wanted to ask for some CNN, some Dan Rather and some Katie
Couric. But instead, I was left with a British bloke, constantly
cutting into the ceremony at ground zero to give his detached
commentary on a tragedy his nation did not face. |
I was shocked
and frustrated. I wanted to ask for some CNN, some Dan Rather and
some Katie Couric. But instead, I was left with a British bloke,
constantly cutting into the ceremony at ground zero to give his
detached commentary on a tragedy his nation did not face.
This was the
first experience in a series that revealed to me the diverse European
reactions to the attacks on America. Upon hearing my American accent,
many Europeans would enquire where exactly I haled from in the states.
My answer of New Jersey, usually received an “oh,” accompanied
by a confused, “where exactly is that?” look. When I
explained that I lived 40 minutes from New York City, it never failed
to get some kind of reaction, whether it would be sympathetic or
otherwise.
On Sept. 12th,
the night after my overwhelming realization that not everybody in
the world was tattered by the events of the previous year; my shaken,
once sturdy, view on world affairs was turned upside down and inside
out.
“It
is your own fault you were attacked,” the Swede told
me as we walked along the river Severn. “Your country
deserved it." |
“It is
your own fault you were attacked,” the Swede told me as we
walked along the river Severn. “Your country deserved it.”
Out of my element,
I again found myself in tears, this time in a verbal bout in the
defense of the values of my country.
“Americans
only care about themselves,” he told me. “You’re
too proud and arrogant, too superficial and when innocent people
are killed in other countries, you do not think twice about it.”
He pointed
to a commercial broadcast on Swedish television, shortly after the
11th, featuring what he described as an American man carrying a
gun, marching to fight back. He mocked it, saying all Americans
wanted to do was fight, defend ourselves and show our power.
To
live through the flames is different. |
“Of course
we needed to fight back,” I told him, “how could we
just allow our country to remain vulnerable, not retaliate, not
defend what we believe in?” I stood beside the river, in the
foggy English twilight, astonished by his blatant hatred of our
country, trying to relay a situation and a feeling that was so understood
at home. As we argued, I realized that as hard as I tried, he was
not going to get it. He was not there that day; he was not frightened
in its aftermath. To live through the flames is different. The shock,
the vulnerability, and the helplessness cannot be given justice
in mere words. One may hear of a tragedy, but cannot feel the grief
of a nation unless they have lived within it.
We
came from opposite ends of the Atlantic, both with a right
to our own views. |
Later I realized
that as shocking as his words were, they were spoken in ignorance.
We were raised in different cultures, brought up with different
beliefs, and taught different histories. I do not recollect learning
Swedish history or government in the duration of my American education
and the majority of his knowledge on the United States had been
derived from Hollywood films. We came from opposite ends of the
Atlantic, both with a right to our own views.
Sept. 11 remained
a hot subject throughout the endurance of my stay abroad. There
were always the “where were you when it happened?” and
the “did you know anybody?” questions, which were sometimes
followed by the embraces of complete strangers. Most people were
curious, some ready to share their experiences—where they
were, how they took it, and how their cities and countries reacted.
Everyone seemed more than willing to express their personal views
on the attacks and on the reaction of the United States. The outlooks
of the various Europeans opened my mind, and I found it interesting
to listen to each individual, take it in, and roll with the punches.
Still, when
I was far from home, crossing the North Sea on a ship en route to
Norway, I felt a sense of comfort and hope when I was asked the
same familiar questions about the tragedy. With my answers, the
Norwegian man whom I had just met, kissed my head, hugged me, and
whispered, “God Bless.” And I realized that despite
cultural differences and varying life experiences, people oceans
away can empathize with one another.
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