| Lifestyles | |
| The Low-Down on Long Distance Relationships (page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7) |
Related Links:
Other Stories in Lifestyles: |
| By
Lauren Frederick Staff Writer |
|
Reality #2: Don’t expect your long-distance relationship to be picturesque and all happy. Don’t expect you and yours to always agree. Don’t expect the next so-called phase of your relationship to be perfect, because it won’t be. There’ll be kinks to be ironed out. Compromises will need to be made. And patience and understanding will be a must. “Well, it keeps things interesting,” quipped Jessica Bossone, “even if you have a perfect relationship now, the stress that being apart puts on you is not something you cannot imagine.” A recent graduate of The College of New Jersey, Bossone has been involved in a long-distance relationship since the start of her sophomore year of college with her boyfriend Jay Dellasanti who lives at home, works, and doesn’t go to college. And things are good—now. She admitted, “After some of the fights we had, I should have just walked away a year ago, but things are just so much better. He’s my best friend and I’m so glad I didn’t walk away.” In the beginning of their long-distance relationship, she and Dellasanti fought a lot. Bossone said that mostly it was because he simply couldn’t relate to what she was feeling or experiencing. “Jay’s college experience was very limited and different …he only went to college for a semester …he doesn’t understand staying up studying all night long for midterms, living next door to your three best friends, or the idea of wanting to go to a frat party,” she explained. He also got jealous a lot. “Especially with me pledging, Jay got put on the back burner,” admitted Bossone, “and he was jealous, not necessarily of other guys but of other things seeming more important than him, which they weren’t. They were just time-consuming.” And although the constant fighting then was indeed upsetting, frustrating, and near exhausting, Bossone now says it was worth it. She knows how he deals with things. He knows what’s important to her. She knows how to talk to him. And he knows how to listen. “You know, some people have that perfect relationship until they’re co-habiting or what-not and they’re forced to deal with it. I think we got a lot of that crap already out of the way,” she said. She became closer with her friends as well. “I had very high convictions about wanting him to understand my time with my friends …I think that had he always been in the picture, let’s say he was here or I was home and commuting, I wouldn’t have the relationship with my friends that I have now. It was totally worth fighting with him to get him to understand that,” said Bossone. She admitted that things might have been easier if she went home every weekend, stayed in her room Friday and Saturday nights, and not gone out with the girls. “Maybe if I had just done what Jay preferred, which is to do nothing and come home every weekend religiously, then you know …I don’t know. Who knows if this relationship would still be together? And if it was, would I have regrets?” |
|
Delighted
to be published in unbound, Lauren Frederick is a junior journalism/professional writing major and
women & gender studies minor at the College. An avid writer, reader, and basketball player, Lauren
hopes to graduate in May 2004 and pursue a career in the publishing/professional writing field.
She'd like to thank all those who helped her with this article, and all those who willingly shared their experiences. And she'd also like to thank MHA who is a constant inspiration. |
|